I haven’t always been this popular. I know that may be really difficult for you to accept, but it’s the truth. I’ll give you a second for you to come to terms with that.
Got it together?
So, as you know, I’m pretty awesome in every single way. I’m not excited to admit this, but my awesomeness is a little thin when it comes to movies. I don’t watch a lot of them.
I fall asleep during most movies. I fell asleep during Grand Torino … while I was on a third date with a guy…in a theater.
Quotes and characters: I know nothing of these.
The Simpsons, Married With Children, Roseanne all have something in common. What’s that? I was forbidden to watch them when I was a child. When you talk about them, I am a social pariah.
I only know what Chewbacca sounds like because people tell me she sounds like my dog. My aunt put up a “How Many of These 50 MostPopular Movies Have You Seen” quiz for the late 80s through the early 90s and my cousin’s daughter – who wasn’t even a glimmer in an eye then – has seen more than me. She’s seen 7. That’s a real story.
I’m sorry guys. I know your really sad to hear that, but there is a glimmer of hope. I went to the movies last night. I saw Saving Mr. Banks and it was so amazing – like me. Usually when I am that excited to see a movie, it lets me down. I am still overwhelmed with that movie. Go see it.
There you have it. I’m an outsider.